How to Pray for an Unsaved Spouse: Prayers and Guidance for a Spiritually Mixed Marriage

Being married to someone who does not share your faith can be one of the loneliest parts of the Christian life. You may sit alone in church, pray alone at the table, and wonder whether your spouse will ever know Jesus. You are not the first believer in this situation, and the Bible speaks to it directly. This guide covers what Scripture says about an unbelieving spouse, how to pray for an unsaved husband or wife, sample prayers you can use, and how to live out your faith at home in a way that draws your spouse in rather than pushing them away.

What the Bible says about an unbelieving spouse

The early church had many mixed marriages, often because one partner came to faith after the wedding. Paul told them to stay together where possible: “if any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she is content to live with him, let him not leave her. The woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he is content to live with her, let her not leave her husband. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified in the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified in the husband” (1 Corinthians 7:12–14, WEB).

Peter adds that a believing spouse’s everyday life can be a witness in itself, so that an unbelieving husband “may be won by the behavior of their wives without a word” (1 Peter 3:1, WEB). The principle applies to husbands and wives alike: a consistent, loving life often speaks louder than arguments.

How to pray for an unsaved spouse

Prayer is not a technique for changing another person on your schedule. It is bringing someone you love to God and trusting his timing. These prayer points can give shape to your daily prayers:

• An open heart. God promised through Ezekiel, “I will also give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit within you. I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh” (Ezekiel 36:26, WEB).
• Spiritual sight. Ask God to help your spouse see Jesus clearly, beyond past hurts, caricatures or bad experiences with church.
• The right people. Pray for friends, coworkers and Christians who will cross your spouse’s path and earn their trust.
• Your own heart. Ask for patience, humility and joy, and for freedom from resentment or spiritual pride.
• Your marriage. Pray for kindness, good communication and unity in everything you can share.
• Your children. If you have children, pray for wisdom in raising them in faith while honoring your spouse.

A prayer for an unsaved husband

Father, thank you for my husband and for every good thing you have placed in him. You know him better than I do, and you love him more than I can. Please open his heart to the truth about Jesus. Bring the right people into his life, and let him see something of your kindness in me, not my impatience. Guard our marriage, help me to love him well today, and give me peace while I wait for your timing. In Jesus’ name, amen.

A prayer for an unsaved wife

Lord, thank you for my wife and for the gift she is to me and to our family. Draw her to yourself in a way she can understand and receive. Remove anything in me that makes the gospel harder for her to hear. Teach me to serve her the way Christ serves his church, to listen well, and to be patient. Give me hope when I am discouraged, and keep our home a place of love. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Living out your faith at home

• Talk less, love more. Repeated sermons, forwarded videos and pointed comments usually feel like pressure. Let your spouse ask questions in their own time.
• Keep going to church, graciously. Invite your spouse occasionally, especially to Christmas, Easter or social events, but do not make church a battleground.
• Honor your spouse in public. Do not complain about your spouse’s unbelief to friends or small groups in ways you would not want them to hear.
• Look for shared values. Generosity, honesty, caring for family and serving neighbors are places you can work together.
• Be honest about your own failures. Apologizing quickly shows grace more clearly than appearing perfect.

When it feels lonely

It is normal to grieve what you hoped for in marriage. Bring that grief to God, and find a trusted friend, mentor or pastor who will pray with you. Many churches have members in the same situation. If your marriage involves abuse, control or threats, your safety comes first; in the United States you can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, and in an emergency call 911.

Holding on to hope

Some spouses come to faith quickly, some after many years, and some not in this life. Your spouse belongs to God, not to your timeline. Faithful love and prayer are never wasted, whatever the outcome you see. Paul’s reminder applies here: God is the one who gives the growth, and he is able to do far more than we ask or imagine.

Scripture quotations are from the World English Bible (WEB) and the King James Version (KJV), both in the public domain.